The esteemed representative of Lower Elbonia

The esteemed representative of Lower Elbonia

I have never made a secret of what low regard I hold my local House representative. She is obtuse, rude, ignores constituents even when we try to be reasonable, and calculates her “open” meetings so only friendlies will appear. She writes like a third grader and her thinking skills are on a par with, possibly, a pretty smart chicken. Her staff is made up of hyper-competitive Christians-in-name-only, who do not hesitate to throw each other under the bus at any opportunity. She is a so-called “rising star” in a party that completely demeans women on a regular basis, often without ever realizing how tone-deaf they are, because, after all, when you’re on top of somebody else, you don’t have to think about it much. I hate the way the Republicans post her like a department-store mannikin in all kinds of high-profile news shots, thus to indicate they “get” the woman thing, even though they don’t. And I hate the way she NEVER EVER opens her mouth in said news shots because, all  Republicans know, as a WOMAN she will just say something inane. And sadly, she WOULD say something inane, because she is so very, very limited. She is also such a party loyalist, such, a good dog, she will obey whatever order Boehner issues her, which is pretty obviously STFU. And I hate hate hated her STUPID rebuttal to Obama’s State of the Union, where she talked about her biography as though it had even the LEAST effect on creating good government policy. SO WHAT IF YOU PICKED APPLES. I DON’T CARE. STOP REPEATING IT LIKE IT MEANS SOMETHING! JEEZ!

Recently she filled the airwaves with a whole new level of of complete capitulation to her Washington masters. But let me present  it all, from beginning to end.

Okay, so as a card-carrying Republican, Cathy hates the ACA, also known as Obamacare. No reason in particular, except, I guess “freedom” (to die slowly in abject poverty) and “‘Murica”, (the place where despite Christian assertions to the contrary, is engaged in a battle of Darwinian fitness, with the amount of money one has standing in for the number of potentially beneficial mutations one might contribute). Of course, also, Boehner told her to hate it, and Cathy is nothing but obedient to authority, ESPECIALLY if said authority has a penis attached.

Cathy’s town hall meetings are never pretty. Try as she might to  slew the attendees to the right by making her events “by invitation”, some pesky ordinary people always find out about them and infiltrate. Then they ask questions. Not shallow, softball questions either, but incisive, pointed questions, about abortion, about immigration, about climate change, about all those topics that Cathy has been briefed on the talking points from only the right-wing side of the spectrum. So, she is COMPLETELY unprepared for these questions. Often she sits like a jackrabbit on the highway, frozen in her abject ignorance of whatever it is somebody is talking about that doesn’t fit her very specific parameters. Sometimes a Fox Fake News watcher will try to bulldoze the questioners, but of late, more and more people have been nodding in assent over these questions, because they are not partisan in nature – they are American in nature.

So here’s the latest. As previously stated, Cathy has been instructed to hate Obamacare. And Cathy has a Facebook page, which I do not doubt some enterprising young staffer set up for her, because Cathy’s busy, don’tcha know. So she posts a request on her Facebook page that asks for people’s experiences with the ACA, fully expecting her constituents to unloose a torrent of horror about how the law completely upended their God-fearing conservative lives.

Over TEN THOUSAND people replied. And most said the same thing. The ACA was the best thing that could have happened to them. Many told her that they were diehard conservatives, yet  the ACA was filling a very important gap for them and their families. She ignored the fact that 15.5 percent of the adult population to age 65 in Stevens County has signed up for the Medicaid expansion in Obamacare, meaning the people of McMorris-Rodgers’ childhood county are joining Obamacare at four times the national average. One in six adults in neighboring deep-red Ferry County has signed up for free Medicaid, thanks solely to Obamacare. And, as usual, the generous liberal side of the state carts the taker conservative side on its back, as King County has only a 1-in-10 signup rate.

Well, all those positive stories must’ve screwed up her expectations, because now the open-feedback section has been wiped, and the responder has to fill out a form to post, presumably so Cathy’s staff can filter the messages and more easily find those occasional nuggets of negativity that will bolster her credibility. Shades of the “Bette in Spokane” fiasco!

Despite the overwhelmingly positive feedback on the ACA from HER DISTRICT, she voted to repeal the very next day.

Then, it gets better. Turns out those paltry few negative stories she came up with? Aren’t part of the Washington State Facebook response at all. Plucked them out of a  website that was put up the same day. Collectively, these sad tales came from California, Pennsylvania, North Carolina, Georgia and Indiana. WHY OH WHY would you have to go to these far flung places to collect this tripe if you actually had it locally?

Oh. I think I am getting it. Cathy is not only not very smart, she is LAZY. Extremely lazy! Too lazy to deal with her staff, who is undoubtedly at the bottom of this faux pas! Too lazy to do any investigating on her own! TOO LAZY! And I as an American taxpayer, am laying out BIG BUCKS to support her fat ass in the style to which she has become accustomed! The worst welfare queen anywhere, ever, has NOTHING on this bee-otch!





Okay, so a lunatic batch of Republicans decided to write a letter to Iran telling them that no matter WHAT kind of peacenik agreements that black guy who happens to be the Prez made, they will be instantly negated the moment a Repub gets elected in 2016.

Right, you guys. Sigh… where does one begin in this festival of ignorance and narcissism? Iran’s Foreign Minister, Mohammad Javad Zarif, did point out the obvious by saying “I should bring one important point to the attention of the authors and that is, the world is not the United States (you ignorant toolbags).” That one comment drew a stark line between his Rhodes Scholar to Tom Cotton’s self-involved kindergartner.

Then there’s the conceit of “when a Republican is elected in 2016.” This is not going to happen. Sure, there’s a lot of ignoramus voters in heavily-gerrymandered districts who keep voting against their own self-interest, keep believing Fox Fake News propaganda, and actually think ex-car-thief Daryl Issa is a pretty smart guy. But these people elect senators and representatives, not Presidents. And it is beginning to look that despite all the millions and millions of dollars poured into conservative PACs, it is a lot harder to buy votes than anybody thought, and the payoff just isn’t happening. No, there won’t be a Republican in the White House any time soon.

Then there’s the deeper wisdom of Republicans wanting another war. Of course they want another war! That’s where the money is! It is the perfect conduit to extract dough right out of American taxpaying wallets to finance actions that can be monetarily flow-charted into payouts to the massive military-industrial complex, which includes not only the manufacture of tools of war, but a huge infrastructure of Halliburton, Keller-Brown-Root, and other “military” contractors. You know, the same guys who helped poison the well in Iraq by shooting civilians and running people off the roads with their Humvees, not to mention charging US taxpayers a fortune to do the same stuff we were already paying for the US military to do. They were also the people who provided substandard body armor and inedible rations to our soldiers, amongst other lying, cheating and stealing. C’mon, did we already forget this?

Of course, if you are a blue-dog Democrat or a Republican, a portion of that filthy lucre migrates right back to you in the form of re-election funds, and we all know the life of an elected representative revolves around the acquisition of money, and not legislation.

Iran is not our enemy. They are an advanced and civilized people who happen to have been roped back into fundamentalism by the ill-considered interventions of the US itself. Iran was well on its way to becoming a nation of citizens committed to progress and stability when we decided we wanted the Shah installed and broke their system. Ever since, they’ve been struggling to find their feet again, but we keep sticking out dirty fingers into their pie. And now this. I pity the poor people of Iran: they have much to overcome.

Make no mistake. When American Congressmen make a decision that there HAS to be another war in a Middle-Eastern country, even as the revolting stench of Iraq still fills their nostrils, there is something else going on. And that something is MONEY. American as a Christian nation? Nawww… our religion is the dollar, and our dogma involves a whole lot of self-involved blindness induced by the collectively hallucinating Republican Congress.